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Wednesday, January 4, 2012

...Disturbing...

I sit here. at my desk, drinking a ginormous mug of chai tea, (which happens to be one of the best things), and thinking. about. an. enemy. Alarm clocks. Alarm clocks are evil, and need to be banned. I mean, seriously, think about it. I'm deep, deep in this restful, peaceful slumber, dreaming happy dreams, of unicorns, and butterflies and summer. Ok. So that's me! Happy. Peaceful. Dreams. When out of the corner of my butterflies, there is this annoying, and I am talking annoying sound. BEEEEEP.... BEEEEPP... BEEPBEEEPBEEEPBEEEPBEEP. Sooooo annoying! So, I whack this object of noise, and two minutes later, my cell calls out to me, once again disturbing my now not-so-peaceful sleep... "In the jungle, the mighhhhty jungle, the Lion sleeps tonighhhhhhhhhhhhht!" it trills. Arg... I wish I were doing that! And so after punching both of these annoying alarms in rapid succession, I wearily rise from my bed. Alarms. Are. Evil. They should be banned! Brain alarms are evil too. I woke up last night. for. no. reason. at. all. and could not sleep. Arg. so. hey! I wrote a story. Look, I know. Ok? But I had to. It was just one of those crazy thoughts that was begging me to let loose. hehe. I am posting it, but be warned, it is a 3:23 a.m. story. And I am not kidding.... I looked at the time. so here goes: (slightly edited for... reasons :)
     "Ooooh no!" I groaned, "my stupid brain. How dare it?!?"
     "Yessssssss! Fistapumps!" shouted my brain, "I have succeded in waking you up at 3:20 for no apparent reason, and NOW  I will churn out as many thoughts as I can, to keep you awake! FISTAPUMPS!"
     All is silent now, except for muffled sounds of crying, issued from a bedraggled form, hunched over on the bed.
     "Please," I begged. "Why me?"
     Brain looked at me and giggled. "Aha. Why? Because I want to. That's why!" More giggles from the brain department. "Here. Let me show you some awesome stuff. This is why you have a brain, duhhh!"
     Sooooo, Brain showed me a little thought about going to Haiti, and friends in other places, and friends we miss, and why people think it's weird if you have a pet plunger, and what would happen if I wore clown shoes, and if we had blue spaghetti, would we eat it? Hmmmm. I didn't even know those thoughts existed!
     "STOPPP!!" I shrieked at Brain, while laughing hysterically. "I mean, it's all verrry entertaining, but if I want to have thoughts tomorrow at work, I have got to sleep!"
     But alas and alack this was not to be, and  Brain kept whirling me around until I was dizzy.
     Finally it chuckled and told me, "Ok, I'm done. I've had my fun. Now i gotta run!"
     And so, just as I let myself drift off into a delicious slumber, I heard a fain sound, which grew louder with each millisecond, I cannot tell you the depth of the events that took place, but I CAN tell you about thte picture afterwards. It is of me sitting triumphantly on the floor, looking at a mound of black powder, blissfully whispering to myself. "Behold. The alarm clock!" .The End.
     And for the crowning touch, I have posted a link to Olan Rogers video, titled alarm clocks. It's extremely hilarious, so watch this if you may.Alarm Clocks


Peacefully rest you all! :)
JoLie

3 comments:

  1. lol:D Osm post!i,like everybody else whos normal, totally sympathize with you! also cheers to olan rogers!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I read this earlier this morning and my internet wouldn't let me comment. So here it goes ;)

    I LOVED this!! So cute and true ^_^ Cracked me up.

    ReplyDelete

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